News > Beyoncé
Beyoncé Shoulda Put A Muzzle On It (Oh Oh Oh…)
By Johnny Firecloud
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Howard Stern played some audio yesterday that was pulled from the board at Beyoncé’s latest appearance on the Today Show, and to put it mildly, a dog being kicked to death would sound better.
This isn’t the first time we’ve seen/heard evidence that there’s much less to our superstar “heroes” than meet the eye- this Britney clip is possibly the most painful reminder – but I’ve always been under the impression that Beyoncé’s got genuine talent. Here’s hoping she couldn’t hear herself, or she’s at least on some kind of high-powered hallucinogen, because… goddamn.
Who are these people? Can we get a real music show with real musicians? Did Aretha need a backing track? Etta? Nina? Elvis? Fucking Mozart?
Anyway, as far as Single Ladies goes, nobody does the dance better than Radiohead’s Thom Yorke.
Don’t drink and sing.
She sounds like she didn’t warm up, can’t hear herself at all and doesn’t care what it sounds like. Not a big deal. We all know she can sing very well.
I needed to be under the influence of “some kind of high-powered hallucinogen” just to listen to that whole clip. Damn. I wonder if auto-tune would’ve helped. I know she can sing. I guess she is human after all, and not just some super-hot cyborg pop star. Sounds like she couldn’t hear herself properly or something. And its not the first time someone sang off key, but damn.
At least it’s not as bad as the Linda McCartney soundboard backup vocals that Mark and Brian used to play on their show. That shit was beyond awful. But then again, Linda McCartney wasn’t trying to be a Diva.
But to be fair, why is not warming up and not caring what it sounds like “not a big deal”? Do we really know if she can sing? What if it is just a big scam? These so-called superstars make every effort to make themselves seem perfect, flawless, and it’s a joke. They should take it seriously and should take the time to warm up, perhaps get a proper sound check if possible and genuinely care about their performance instead of just phoning it in. Otherwise, why should we, as music fans, care?
in my opinion, britney spears and beyonce performances are in an entirely different category as rock and hip hop shows. i think it’s… well, i won’t say it’s unfair, but i think it’s kinda pointless to judge the apples’ orange peels so to speak. the pop stars are there to lip synch and dance, and they’re not worrying about the vocal performance. no, not britney spears nor beyoncé can sing very well. we should know that. britney has way better songs written for her, and can dance better- but that’s how they stack up and no use comparing no vocal abilities worth speaking of to no vocal abilities worth speaking of. trent reznor can’t rap, thom yorke can’t shred the guitar.
but i suppose it’s always going to be fun to laugh at them when they try.
haha I’m picturing Thom Yorke going all Joe Satriani on a strat. That would be cool and funny. I agree, though, apples and apples can’t be compared. I guess we should have all known better and not be surprised.
This is probably the closest you’ll get http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzjtyoYSs98
But while we’re on topic, Beyonce has often been compared to Etta. Nina. And especially to Aretha in the media. That’s the reason this piece is up, aside from the obvious comedic value.
Due to the overwhelming bootyliciousness of Mrs. Jigga so prominently displayed in your article in an obvioius ploy to…I don’t know, maybe you just think she’s got a great ass. Anyhoo, I forgive her and chalk it up to her bodysuit being so constricting that all of her blood rushed to her head and she couldn’t hear a thing.
yes- on the comparisons to etta / nina / aretha front, this is the good fight. that’s a load of horse shit.
Even her ass is fake. Remember that time her “enhancement” was showing? Yeah. Most of these fucking “singers” are 100% fake. The masses need pretty faces, so they attach them to the pretty voice that actually sings on the albums and the backing tracks.
You don;t say Fernando…you’ve enlightened me…
Oh, I’m glad I can change the world with a blog comment.
apparently this whole thing was a hoax:
http://www.tmz.com/2009/04/22/beyonces-dad-was-right-hoax-hoax-hoax/
Even though it was a hoax, the fact remains that many people were willing to believe that she was singing that badly. So why the huge public perception that Beyonce is on par with Britney, Ashley Simpson and Milli Vanilli? Are people just ready to believe anything they hear, are they spiteful haters who want to believe the worst about everyone, are they vindictive and just want to see the famous brought low, or is there a real question as to Beyonces talent and image, especially after the whole Aretha Franklin/ Etta James thing. I admit I was taken in by the hoax, probably because I don’t buy into the star-hype, and want to believe that she is fallible, as we all are, and I still question Beyonces larger-than-life, perfect, diva posturing. I don’t think her image is exactly screaming genuineness. That is why people were willing to believe the hoax. Skepticism is a healthy thing, and I’m still not buying that she is as phenomenally great as people(including her dad) say she is. The jury is still out on this as far as I am concerned. Legendary status cannot be conferred, it must be earned. Her star is shining bright now, but let’s see where she is 40 years from now, whether her career and integrity has held up accordingly. Then maybe we can include her with the true legends.
Also, How did the hoaxer fake it? If thats not her, then who is it? And how did he alter the original recording? Is that even beyonce singing? Inquiring minds want to know!
Damn… that’s just ugly. Bring real fucking talent back. If she can actually sing, then fucking do it, period.
Great clip, they play some other back-track-fuck-ups.
Oh please! this clip’s been edited to make her look bad!!!
it’s jealousy- period!
I TOTALLY agree with zoopster. That just ISN’T Beyonce…and who says otherwise, though I am democratic, is just stupid!!!!!