Thursday, April 16th 2009

 

Blogs:  Amanda Palmer

The Emperor’s Clothes Don’t Fit Amanda Palmer

By Johnny Firecloud

One thing is uncompromisingly clear about Amanda Palmer: she’s an artist, to the deepest marrow. A thrashing live wire of creativity and expression, this sometime Dresden Doll and full-time independent spirit has carved her own path and proven time and time again that giving a double jazz-hands middle finger to the industry’s standard operating methods can do more for her success, her fanbase and her philosophical legacy than her label ever could- or would.

afpclothesline

Roadrunner Records, home to such beaming beacons of musical wonder as Nickelback, Killswitch Engage and Hatebreed, has made no effort to promote Palmer’s latest album, Who Killed Amanda Palmer? They considered her commercially sterile and ”uncommercially fat,” yet refuse to allow her to take her business elsewhere- despite an outright refusal to provide any of the support a record label exists to provide in the first place.

Never one to mince words, on March 28 in Ft. Lauderdale, Palmer reworked the old Mancini song Moon River as a dedication to Roadrunner Records:

Get the Flash Player to see the wordTube Media Player.

The lyrics seem to have been written out in letter form:

Please drop me, I don’t fit on your roster. I’m tired of this pointless shit, please drop me. What do I have to do? I’m tired of sucking corporate dick. You don’t get me, you won’t let me continue my career in peace, and it’s making me sad. Too late now to fix this fucking mess, so please just let me go. I swear, you won’t miss me. You don’t love me. I’m not making you any money. Plus you’ll still have Slipknot, and Annihilator and Machine Head, and Cradle of Filth and Megadeth, and 3 Inches of Blood and Life of Agony, and Mutiny Within and Hatebreed, and Killswitch Engage and Nickelback.

Before you write off the poor little artsy girl chewing on sour grapes ’cause she couldn’t hang with the big boys, it should be known that Amanda’s much more than an eyebrow-shaving drama queen pissing in the gift-horse’s mouth. When touring behind her solo record, rather than doing it on her own or bringing a backing band, Palmer chose to bring four actors called The Danger Ensemble and a violinist with her- a suicidal business move for a smaller-scale musician, even with label support. For the ensuing six months, she and her vagabond crew lived a literal patchwork existence, relying on the kindness of her fans, defying the cornerstone laws of those who only see in red and black.

No doubt inspired by this, and alienated from the very people that should be supporting her, she put her gripes on paper in an open letter to her label, spelling out her frustrations (in anti-Kanye typing style, no less):

i had to EXPLAIN to the so-called “head of digital media” of roadrunner australia WHAT TWITTER WAS. and his brush-off that “it hasn’t caught on here yet” was ABSURD because the next day i twittered that i was doing an impromptu gathering in a public park and 12 hours later, 150 underage fans – who couldn’t attend the show – showed up to get their records signed.

no manager knew! i didn’t even warn or tell her! no agents! no security! no venue! we were in a fucking public park! life is becoming awesome.

also interesting: i brought a troupe of back-up actors/dancers on the tour (we were only playing 300-1000 seaters) and had no money to pay them, so we passed the hat into the crowd every night. each performer walked from each show with about $200 in cash. the fans TOOK CARE OF THEM. they brought us dinner every night, gave us places to sleep. (i couldn’t afford to put up that many people in hotels).

all sans label, all using email and twitter. the fans followed the adventure. they LOVED HELPING.

so?

the times they are a-changing fucking dramatically, when pong-twittering with trent reznor means way more to your fan-base/business than whether or not the record is in fucking stores (and in my case, it ain’t in fucking stores).

twitter is EVERYTHING that you explain in your rants: it is a MAINLINE insta-connection with the fans. there is ZERO middleman.

my fans hung out with me all day on twitter today while i unpacked weird tour shit, fan art, gifts and paraphernalia that usually just ends up in my closet or in the trash and took pictures of it for them.

xa

Amanda’s right. The concept that Twitter hasn’t “caught on” anywhere at this point is indeed absurd. Having just roared past 14 million users, microblogging mania is sweeping the land- and any label shot-caller with half a mind should be aware of this. Embracing this. On top of this, racing to stay ahead of the curve, encouraging their artists to take part and connect directly with their fans. Because that’s exactly where all this is going. The middleman is an infection, an infestation- and he’s headed the way of the milkman. Reznor’s waving the flag, and the war drums are now within earshot.

But the labels refuse to accept this. Instead, they scoff at these unconventional (new) ideas. Put up the shields. Raise the alarm. Regress and defend their dwindling molehills of industry capital, teeth gnashing, hands over their eyes and ears.

By contrast, examine Amanda’s informal mission statement, in her own words:

i don’t do this to make money. i don’t do this to win approval. i do this to be around people i love. i do this to make art, to feel connected, to make love and not war and art and not pain.

Do yourself a favor and read the entire post. It’s a beautiful send-off to an experience of the truly pure-hearted, for the sake of creation and art. For the love of it all. Her blog is a vast, deep archive of artistic expression, of pure-hearted, unabashed love for creation, performance, for love itself. I’ve traded many hours of sleep to walk around in her blog world over the past year and change, and I feel lucky to have been a part- even vicariously- of such a pure display of expressionistic passion thus far.

Here’s a great video of her covering a Radiohead song from Black Cab Sessions, giving new life to a dead relic:

Get the Flash Player to see the wordTube Media Player.

Over the next few weeks, Amanda’s upping her own performance-art ante even further. She’s a pivotal participant in a play put on at her old high school in Lexington, MA, but you can shove that Godspell right up your ass; this musical’s based on Neutral Milk Hotel’s In the Aeroplane Over The Sea. She’s playing Coachella, but is going way beyond the call of bill-filler duty. Hell, she even plays random secret shows for her Twitter followers- a concept that serves as a glaring, real-time example of the Industry’s Fatal Flaw: they have no idea how to play it fast and loose.

Her art, work ethic and industry philosophies ring a hard bell here at Antiquiet, and we’re proud to support such a true defender of the craft.

 

Meanwhile, On The Internet...

 
46 comments
  1. Joseph Rose says:

    I saw her with Dresden Dolls and dug it. But really, what a hypocritical bitch.

    It’s so easy to cry and play the victim in public after you intentionally tried to get signed to the label that houses “Slipknot, and Annihilator and Machine Head, and Cradle of Filth and Megadeth, and 3 Inches of Blood and Life of Agony, and Mutiny Within and Hatebreed, and Killswitch Engage and Nickelback.” What, she thought she fit on the roster before signing?

    She’s full of shit, and she’s salty that she isn’t selling as many records as some random dudes in masks from Iowa.

    • Sheila says:

      Clothes don’t fit Amanda Palmer in general. She is a beached whale. What a sad society we live in that vulgar and marginal performers like Palmer can get press coverage in order to prattle on about their idiot philosophies, which are so dull and intellectually vapid. Palmer is a Scientology Hooker.

  2. Adam says:

    Yes, but the difference is those random masked dudes from Iowa have been around alot longer, they got in on the ‘shock rock’ trend and appeal to a much wider demographic than she does.

  3. Joseph Rose says:

    The point is, Roadrunner didn’t find her and beg to sign her. Roadrunner is notorious for low-balling bands financially, which means that they are probably the ONLY label that would even have her. She was fucking thrilled to “suck corporate dick”. Now she has a public platform (thanks to Roadrunner) and she’s using to bite the hand that feeds and be the cool anti-rock star. Bullshit.

  4. “It’s evolution, baby!”, “Power to the people, right on!” and so on…

  5. Rory says:

    This band sucks.

  6. Stephen Pate says:

    We carried this story and support her. Got the same five male malcontents aka Roadrunner ringers on our site too. Fans si, roadrunner sucks

  7. RF says:

    I can’t help but think that (especially today, but even a few years ago) signing on to a record label is a trap. There’s been an expectation that in order to be a successful professional musician, you need to get signed…and back when being on a record label gave you access to fans and tour support and got your songs on the radio and your records in stores, that was probably true. It certainly doesn’t seem like most current artists get anywhere near that kind of return for being signed. If you’re not a megastar, you can pretty much do everything a label will do for you by yourself, and no doubt do it better.

    And then there’s the money. Those usurious record-label contracts might have been justified back then, but today? Not so much. And once that business model has gone toxic, once the label is neither the only nor the best option for a professional musician, it would take a very special kind of idiot to believe that loyalty to a record label should trump, well, anything else.

    So yeah, you could bash Amanda Palmer for biting “the hand that feeds,” if you could demonstrate ways in which being on Roadrunner is of any benefit to her RIGHT NOW, that she is in fact being fed by that hand. It seems that it isn’t at all beneficial in her case, it’s just getting in the way of her work. She’s smart enough, self-possessed enough, and enough of a canny businesswoman to see that.

    It also seems that Roadrunner isn’t making any money off of her, either, which is another point in favor of “Please Drop Me.” If they held on to her contract, it would most likely be out of spite, not good business sense — she’s not going to make millions of dollars for Roadrunner or go off to make millions of dollars for another label, so what do they lose by cutting her loose?

  8. Xenu says:

    Amanda Palmer is a social climbing Scientologist and part of a network of Scientologists who continually promote each other. She is involved with Scientologist Neil Gaiman who has given over $100,000.00 to the CULT. Amanda Palmer is a talentless, caterwauling hack who makes up for her ineloquence and dreadful songwriting abilities with tantrum throwing and exposing the world to her underwear and rape stories and creepy bisexuality. She is trying to copy the salesmanship of fellow Scientologist Tori Amos but with even less talent. Scientologists think the internet is a big superstore where they continually promote each other at our expense. The sooner Palmer goes away, the better for our ears. What an idiot.

  9. Rant says:

    Pure-hearted my ass. Bottomline is Amanda Palmer is mediocre. She can’t sing, can’t play and writes crap songs. Palmer is boring and predictable… the minute she loses her audience’s attention, off come her clothes and she calls it “art.” The minute her record company doesn’t want to promote her awful record, she whines and claims they think she’s “fat.” Now she’s jumped on the Gaiman train, which really makes me think she is a crazy workaholic Scientologist, spending every waking minute publicizing her dopey record. The book for Who Killed Amanda Palmer is a vanity project. There is no publisher attached— no one would touch it. That’s how Gaiman started his book career, self publishing and using his Scientology connections to get ahead. The sooner her 15 minutes are up, the better.

  10. nomorewhiners says:

    Ugh. She is awful. Why doesn’t she take a picture of her own crap and twitter it everywhere, it would be more interesting than her “music.” Oh wait, she already has.

  11. Lisa says:

    Amanda is amazing. And I love her.

  12. Setsuna says:

    Have any of you ripping on the artist done what she has done better? Tell me so that I can follow you.

  13. canto says:

    What do you care whether people rip Palmer or not? Palmer has put herself in a glass house and not bothered to learn to play or sing. She seeks attention the same way Tiny Tim did in his day. Hey, that’s a good idea, why doesn’t Amanda Palmer cover Tip Toe through the Tulips? That’ll get her some press!

  14. amber says:

    i’d like to mention to those rambling about amanda “biting the hand that feeds” that they stopped promoting her music.
    she’s mentioned on her blog before that she was cool with the fact they didn’t pay her shit as long as they promoted her, that that was part of whatever contract she signed, and they dropped their end of the deal.
    wanting to leave the label is perfectly reasonable.

    i’m not going to bother arguing with some of these other utterly inane comments though; if you think amanda palmer of all people is a talentless attention whore, then you probably really hate humanity or something.

  15. Repoman says:

    I’m not surprised the emperor’s clothes don’t fit Amanda Palmer…. she appears to be built to play football.

  16. Nancika says:

    Amanda Palmer’s is a jerkass scientologist along with Neil Gaiman and Tori Amos. Gaiman and Palmer have a contract to work together. The crazy scienos have an army of bloggers that post all over the web, but nothing can help the fact that Palmer stinks.

  17. lightning says:

    Oh rreeeealllly?

    Newsflash, dork. Scientology is a dangerous CULT, that destroys lives, strips people of their money, brainwashes them and drives them to despair and death. And Amanda Palmer funds them. Look at this nutty chick who has been contracted to marry Neil Gaiman, who is listed with his ex-wife in 2009 as contributing $35,000.00 even as he denies being involved. Gaiman is a hypocrite and Palmer is a desperate wanna be who is too nutty and untalented to ever get anywhere.

    Neil Gaiman’s 2009 contributions to the CULT of Scientology are listed in Cornerstone Newsletter (circa November 2009)

    $142 million plus given to Super Power Scam – Ex Scientologist Message Board

    http://www.forum.exscn.net/showthread.php?t=16197

    Under

    CORNERSTONE CLUB MEMBERS [1315] [$35,000.00]

    You’ll find:

    Mary & Neil Gaiman

    And as the ex Scientologists state: “Also, this list does not include donations made by people who have since left the Church and been declared SP’s or “ethics bait”. The Church deletes those people’s names from the lists.”

  18. Skwerl says:

    you know who is crazier than scientologists? people who freak out and write long, well researched blog comments tearing artists, musicians or actors apart just because they’re scientologists. whoop de friggin’ do, lightning.

  19. Thor Man says:

    Her music isn’t my cup of tea but I sure as hell will support her all the way. Why? Cause she’s doing what makes her and her fans happy. She is expressing herself and that is enough for me. She’s got sack locking horns with Roadrunner.

    Everyone bashing her needs to turn down the heat a bit. Who cares if she is or isnt a Scientologist? Last time I checked I came here to read up on whats going on in the MUSIC world. Grow the fuck up. Your missing the whole fucking point of it.

  20. canto says:

    Amanda Palmer and Neil Gaiman are Scientologists. Neil Gaiman just has donated $35,000.00 to Scientology AGAIN (November 2009), according to the Cornerstone Newsletter, and has been named a Scientology Founding Patron. Gaiman and Palmer are working as a team, with the Scientology seal of approval. They got paired up to make money, that’s why their relationship was “launched” with pictures, a soundtrack, a self published vanity book of bloody snuff porn pictures of Palmer. These two idiots seem to take a photographer where ever they go to catch every “intimate” moment. What a pair of losers.

  21. Sarah says:

    Amanda Palmer and Neil Gaiman are fucking awesome. If you’d ever heard her solo record, you’d know that she is a good singer/songwriter and she does have talent. Chill out with all the Scientology paranoia, guys.

  22. canto says:

    Neil Gaiman just donated another half a million dollars to Scientology in 2010 through his business partner Mary Gaiman and their Blank Corporation. They are building an “Ideal Org” in Minneapolis. This isn’t paranoia, Gaiman and Palmer are lying Scientologists. That’s why they are churning out press releases, Scientologists make $50.00 a week and eat rice and beans to attend to the celebrities. Also, Scienos don’t care if the crazy bitch can sing, they are going to shove her down your throat, like it or not.

    • kathy gibb says:

      hmmm…I saw Evelyn/ Evelyn in DC last month and that show was a whole lot of fun, way more fun then seeing New Pornographers a few weeks ago ( a great band really in need of a good frontman)..I never considered it my business who an artist slept with, what religion they believed in or what they had for dinner last night….and really, all the scientology complaints reminds me of the “Michael Stipe is gay” bashing that went on 20 years ago with REM…..

  23. whalewatcher says:

    Amanda Palmer is a useless wanna be no one listens to. She is a crap artist. Her songs are junk, she was dropped from her record contract and now she does cover songs. Amanda Palmer mocks the disabled, strips in public and makes racist remarks about the KKK. Amanda Palmer isn’t interesting, just a desperate joke. Why don’t you go chuck some more money at Scientology and see if they buy you out of your failing careers.

  24. jimmy joe says:

    No one will sign Palmer because she stinks! Record companies are not charities and Palmer is crap!

  25. Ren says:

    I guess people like to watch her run around & act “dark,” or nuts, or hell.. I dunno. *shrug* Maybe they find her unpredictable and intriguing.. but I know LOTS of AP fans, and frankly, I just don’t get it. *shakes head* To me, she just comes off as contrived, unbelievably narcissistic, predictable, loud, obnoxious & simply outrageous for outrageousness’ sake. Hell.. to me she seems pretty damned formulaic… Like those under-loved girls in school who’d do dumb stuff just to get attention- no matter how sick or unhealthy it was, or how stupid they looked in the process… You know? And that’s a sickness in itself. ..But I digress: I’ve found I enjoy ONE of the Doll’s songs, and that’s about it. (And that because her shouting through most of it actually fits the piece… :P)

    Sorry, but to me, if you’re gonna have a –singing– career, you need to be able to actually SING… There needs to be a REASON why you’re worthy enough to stand up in front of other people and wield that mic- and that reason needs to go beyond someone just having enough balls to do it.

    I’ve seen performers of MANY types, styles & body shapes perform RINGS around this woman- people who’ll likely never see the kind of even mediocre fame she’s come to know.. and I just don’t get it. IMHO, you need to have beat out countless other talented people to get to be a recording “artist.” Not just unhinged or well-connected or “lucky.” To me, you’re not worthy of that mic just ’cause you hang with the right people, wear the right clothes, act like a megalomaniac, or do “crazy” stuff just to get attention. :P And that stands no matter WHO you are- be you Britney, Christina, or any other star. Simple, massive ego does not a star make.

    Not just Amanda Palmer.

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  42. Rey Peas says:

    S.C.I.E.N.T.O.L.O.G.Y Amanda Palmer is a SCIENTOLOGIST. Palmer is untalented and incapable of writing a descent song or hitting a note, she seems to be bipolar or mentally impaired. After a series of bizarre marketing moves that range from sexting and making racist remarksinvolving the KKK she now decides to mock the disabled. Amanda Palmer isn’t interesting, just a desperate joke. Amanda Palmer should be in a mental ward, not on a stage. Palmer is the product of a Sea Org family who married into the higher ranking Scientology Gaiman family. She gives millions to the cult of Scientology.

  43. Jacky Blue says:

    I only NOW found this site which is willing to be the unabashed antithesis of all those others that are run and populated by sycophants that deify an actor, musician, etc. to such a point that if you don’t LIKE a virtual compliment they post (but you don’t DISLIKE; it’s often too uninteresting to be caught on your radar) or respond to their next batch of accolades, they come at you like rabid elephants. I certainly have my share of critics online regarding a couple of records I did, but I never want to know the details of how badly or how kindly someone may speak because I would kick my ass for several days. Paradoxically, it’s liberating to be able to say what I honestly think about something without verbal puishment. Amanda Palmer doesn’t bother me at all, there is a definite I’m quirky see me see gimme attention vibe at times about her in live shows I watched on YouTube which I could see myself possibly having a hard time listeing to a whole album at once.

  44. Billy Bob says:

    Amanda Palmer is revolting. She is just another fucking whore pretending to be a feminist while doing the same thing porn stars do to get attention, stripping off and sucking off. Just cut to the chase Palmer. You fucked old man Gaiman for money and it still didn’t get you anywhere. Do everybody a favor and blow.

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