The tracks on this mix tell a story I’m sure you all recognize: Love. True. Love.

I’m not going to give you the track by track review of what each song is saying, because true love and the way it is expressed in various artforms is best interpreted by each individual. I hope you’ll be able to follow the story. I will, though, tell you why each song has special meaning to me.

If you live in California, you’re no stranger to union strikes and all the drama that comes with their various protests. Even if you don’t, no doubt you recently felt the impact when every television show (except for Celebrity Fit Club, thank Jesus) was forced to take a little break because Hollywood writers ran out of creativity or money or something- but I digress…

Recently, union struggles have severely impacted the University of California (UC) campuses. The American Federation of State, County, and Municipal Employees (AFSCME), which represents some 20,000 University of California healthcare and service employees (5,400 employed at UCLA alone) has organized its members who have been working for months on expired contracts.

You’re sitting on your ass already, so why not raise some money for a good cause? If you don’t give a shit about “good causes” you can use this opportunity to take money away from Microsoft. I’ll admit it; it’s a bit of both for me.

I don’t know many people who use MSN Messenger very often these days, including myself, but I’m back as of tomorrow and you and I should chat. But, for the next 30 days, I’ll be sacrificing myself for the greater good by making my MSN Messenger contact information public.

My name is Britney Bernstein and I love black people. I’m a big fan of the NBA, rap music, BET, and Barack Obama. In the interest of keeping things kosher watermelon on this website, I decided I should review an album by a black person since most of them have been on shitty white bands / singers. God, I hate Katy Perry and I haven’t listened to her album yet either.

Nevermind, I take it back. I’m a fan of black people like Mos Def and Michael Jackson, and I hate Barack Obama. My favorite players in the NBA are Luke Walton and Jordan Farmar. My favorite rapper is Robert Van Winkle and I love the Disney Channel.

As I was flipping through this month’s edition of my mysteriously free and never-ending subscription to Maxim Magazine, I read that Busta Rhymes released an album on Tuesday. I went on to the intarwebs and starting searching torrent sites for Blessed. Considering how easy it was to get Chinese Democracy, I was a little discouraged by not being able to find Blessed. On top of that, Maxim lied to me because Blessed isn’t being released until August or some bullshit. By the way, this album was supposed to be released in December ‘07, and the release date has been pushed back like 4 times.

It looks like women who have been ripped off by the Creator in the looks department are going to become obsolete unless they step it up.

Naturally, our kinky friends in Japan at Sega Toys have developed a humanoid robot. She’s not exactly a FemBot or straight out of Weird Science a la Kelly LeBrock, but she does all those things you look for when you settle for an unfortunate looking girlfriend.

Ugly girls know they only get boyfriends because they give great blowjobs, can cook, or have some other special skill. Just the same, I know that I’m too much of a fucking bitch to score a man, which is why I rely on my “awesome, rockin’ tits” (may or may not be quoted from one of the undersexed men who write on this site) to land a man.